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The communication rule communicators most often forget

I'm all about rules this week. In my last post and in the comments, we talked about the most-violated rules of communication.

Now I'd like, for the first time sober--this is one of my favorite barroom theories--I'd like to lay out my "Everybody Knows Everything Anyway" rule and see what you think.

Bartender, get us another round:

Here's the deal with communication: Most of the time, everybody already knows everything anyway, before you even open your yap.

Give you an example: Once, after breaking up with her boyfriend of several years, my sister told me I should have said I didn't like him. Said she would have broken up with him much sooner.

Now come on, Sis: You've known me all my life. And you've watched me in hundreds and thousands of conversations and interactions. And you watched me strain and struggle to talk to your boyfriend, watched me react to hundreds of lame things he said. You know what my face looks like when I'm interested in what someone's saying, and when I'm not. You know my real laugh. You know my fake laugh. You can tell from across a gymnasium whether or not I respect the person I'm talking to.

You know how I felt about him!

A small example, I know; but one that can often be extrapolated all the way to employee communication. Say somebody has been working for a company for five years.

Has had thousands of conversations with thousands of other employees at the company, from underlings to colleagues to supervisors to directors and even VPs.

Has worked on dozens of projects, and seen how people in their department and in other departments work, how they think, how they treat one another.

Has seen how the behavior of all these people in all these contexts jibes and does not jibe with the company's advertising, its annual report, its press releases, its official internal communications, its values statement.

Has weighed all that against the news coverage the company gets, and the opinions of analysts and the vote-with-their-wallets input from shareholders.

And, armed with all that information, the five-year veteran employee has interacted with the company's customers, members of the community the company does business in, and every random yahoo at every cocktail party and Little League baseball game.

What, exactly, do we think we communicators are going to tell this person in order to get him or her "engaged," in order to "change his or her behavior," in order to make him or her a sincere "ambassador" for the organization.

This five-year veteran, like my sister, already knows everything there is to know about the situation. Like my sister in her relationship, the five-year veteran will do what exactly makes psycholigcal, spiritual and economic sense, when it makes psychological, spiritual and economic sense.

Right?

I say this not to say communictors and communications have no role to play in the life of the corporation--we have an important role in conveying official corporate information and helping employees have conversations with one another and management--but only to explain the grave doubt I feel whenever I hear us talk about changing behaviors, capturing hearts and souls and the like.

People know more than we think, and in the case of my sister, know more than even they think.

In short, everybody already knows everything important, and we are foolish to overestimate our ability to influence things.

Bartender, one more, then we gotta go.

Comments (11)

Now THIS is a blog post! Rock on!

You have, in five short paragraphs, described all the streams of information entering an employee's mind. It's hard to say on any given day which one might weigh in most strongly. So you're right, at least when it comes to communicating with employees: lots of internal communication stuff doesn't take a rocket scientist.

UNLESS, of course, the communication is trying to put forward B.S. to counter what the employees REALLY know from all those data streams. Then it gets difficult. And I've done it myself, mea culpa: gotten so sucked in to the tasks and deadlines and strategic plans that I forgot to ask myself if it was worthwhile or just bullshit. And if it's bullshit, do the execs KNOW it's bullshit or have they been sucked into the same mind-numbing vortex as I?

How do I fight this? I remind myself to be humble; I don't save lives or lead a nation. I do what I know as well as I can. And I try to step back occasionally--as you did in this post--to see reality as it looks from there.

To me, Jane, the best test is for the employee communicator to ask him or herself: If I were reading this, would I believe it? Does it lend weight to what I already know is true about this organization?

Or does the message seem, as so much employee communication stuff does, "aspirational"?

And the moment an employee communicator starts to think his or her interests are significantly different from, education greater than, tastes better developed than those of the average employee? As Larry Ragan used to say, "He is in more trouble than he knows."

But isn't thinking we're better than, smarter than, and more in tune than other employees just a downside of having designated "communicators" rather than a CULTURE of communication? If it's my job to "facilitate communication," it means it's NOT the job of the other employees. It means I get to censor some things and promote others; I get to step back and consider the "big picture"; I get to decide what's in the company's and the employees' best interest. The other poor non-communication schlubs just get to pay attention to their world and do their vastly more do-able job.

If there's an entire culture of communication, though, we all do the right things as easily and unconsciously as breathing, on the whole. Every aspect of your data stream works the way it's supposed to. Problems are opened to the light of day and dealt with responsibly. Employees feel that they get the real deal from execs, and they turn around and behave accordingly when they're talking to their neighbors.

Utopia? Sure, but we could get a lot closer than we are.

This may shock you, Dave, but I agree with you -- for the most part.

And the reason I mostly agree with you is because every communication audit I've performed for clients has revealed this truth. Employees will find out what's going on -- or what they think is going on, which sometimes isn't accurate -- regardless of whether or not the organization's leaders communicate with them.

Part of the role of communication is to help build a productive working relationship between the organization's leaders and its employees -- a relationship that, hopefully, is built on mutual trust. In order for employees to trust management, they do need to hear what's going on and what's being planned straight from the horses' mouths. If that information is credible, makes sense, jibes with what employees already know from their other myriad sources, then employees might trust management and therefore invest themselves in the organization's effort. If not, then they will probably choose to divest themselves from it, causing all sorts of problems.

And, as Jane points out, another important role of communication is to facilitate the conversations that must take place between leaders and workers -- to create the opportunities, the means, the (pardon me) infrastructure that enables the sharing of knowledge and information. In that way, I believe we ARE able to influence people's behaviors.

Let's not sell ourselves short. No, it's not rocket science, and no, most of us aren't going to save the world through what we do. But let's face it -- many business leaders simply don't understand how to facilitate the exchange of information and knowledge. They don't see why building relationships based on mutual trust is so crucial.

And as long as that is the case, we communicators have a lot of value to offer.

Kristen:

I agree that employees know most everything about the company they work for, but I would argue that precisely BECAUSE they have their own jobs to do, and they are mostly focused on that priority they either don't remember or don't fully notice some of the things they know.

THAT is where I see my role. To highlight and bring back to people's attention things that may help them remember why they can be proud of the company we all spend a LOT of hours at every week. To make certain that they do in fact know what they think they know. Because I have certainly had personal experience THINKING I know all about something, and then a single brief incisive comment from someone smacks me right in the face with how dumb I actually was.

Not that I'm suggesting employees are dumb, I'm absolutely not, but we all have a tendancy to get really focused on some things and therefore not really see and hear other things. With the right kind of simple, honest "highlighting" of bits of information they may not have noticed, we communicators can help with that.

Jane is right, it's not brain surgery, but I do think we can make a difference in our little corner of the world. Hell, if we can't then I've REALLY been wasting my time the last 15 years and that would be depressing!

Jane, Robert, Kristen--I agree with you 100% when you describe the good and important work communicators CAN and MUST do. (And--let's give management some credit--were more or less hired too do.)

I think it's important to keep this in mind, though, so that we focus sharply our incredibly limited resources on doing what we can (and not what we can't).

May I add that I love it when the comments are better than the blog item itself? I get this feeling that others are doing my work for me. Thanks, "others"!

Feel free to share a portion of your paycheck, David. ;-)

Seriously, that's what a good blog entry does -- elicits thoughtful comments from readers so we all end up learning something from each other.

Plus it's freakin' FUN.

I look at my job differently...I think my goal should be to connect the employees to one another - telling their stories, reminding them of why they do what the do - much more than communicating what administration has in mind. Maybe I'm missing that "strategic" chip in my brain, but that's just how I roll.

Well, Eileen, I think your focus is a much-overlooked job of communicators. As I often say, "Since when has management struggled to find a way to tell employees what's on its mind?"

But management struggles everywhere to do so in a way that encourages employees to actually hear and accept and respond intelligently.

I do think that's a big part of our job, though as you point out, not our only job.

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on May 22, 2007 3:56 PM.

The previous post in this blog was Most-violated communication commandment.

The next post in this blog is Strategery, and the ink-stained wretch.

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