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We are all alone

Okay, so I think I've mentioned here that I love golf. I worked on a golf course in college, I write about golf for newspapers and magazines that will let me, I'm a mid-80s shooter--despite all my passion, only a little better than I was 20 years ago, in high school.

Well on Sunday I shot a four-over-par 76.

The consistent excellence of my golf swing that day was highlighted by the fact that made no miraculous shots or long putts.

After I parred 18, I asked my partner, a dreadful golfer who had shot about 120, if he had any idea what I had just accomplished. Of course he had none.

"I shot 76, man. Four over. Probably one of the best five or six rounds of my life."

"Well," he said, "your putting was terrible."

Comments (20)

As someone who consistently shoots in the mid-140s or 200s or something like that -- and yet who loves playing golf anyway -- I think your putting sucks.

With friends like him, who needs enemas?

Why is it that Americans hate excellence so? Tiger Woods and I wonder about this all the time.

David,

This is a little off-topic, although it has to do with golf and communications, so I hope you don't mind.

My company sponsors a charity golf event to benefit three charities. I'm in charge of communications and logistics. One area that I haven't been able to gain traction on is coverage of the event in local media. These are newspapers that often run nice articles (with photos) of other charity events. My company's event has never gotten any press.

Two factors may be that our charities are not nationally known (like Big Brothers/Big Sisters) and we don't have "big name" participants like sports stars.

Do you have any thoughts about ways to promote the event that I'm overlooking? We've tried the angle of a nice potential giveaway (15 people shooting for a new Bentley). But I'm stumped!

You can check out the website that I created for this event at www.vcigolf.org.

Thanks.

Tom

PS--I suck at golf, and only enjoy a best-ball tournament where I don't slow down play.

Tom, didn't you hit a golf shot last year that pinged painfully off the backside of your wife, or your daughter? THAT would be a nice angle for a story.

I guess if you don't got no celebrities, I'd focus on the Bentley competition, pitching a story about this event-within-the-event: How does the contest work, who is competing for the car, which one or two want/deserve it most, etc.

Make a giant drama out of the thing that a local reporter might like to come and cover.

Or, get a celebrity to play. Maybe, like, a local Chicago golf writer revered for his eloquent prose style and storytelling mastery.

For instance, I believe I'm available on that day.

David Murray: A Golf Legend in his Own Mind. :-)

Hey Tom, news media always like stories about people, so what about pitching the story of one (or a group of) the beneficiaries of the tourney? Something that ties the event to a great human-interest story. I'm thinking about all those PSAs that come on during televised golf tournaments that show the kids who benefit from the Tiger Woods Foundation, out on the course, hanging out with Tiger. OK, so you don't have Tiger, but you might have a really good story about real people whose lives are positively affected by the golf tournament.

And TV loves visuals. So what about encouraging tournament participants to dress in "classic" golf attire, or maybe '70s golf attire (plaid pants, mustard-colored shirts, white shoes -- you know, the way Murray dresses when he plays)? If you promise good visuals, that might attract media on a medium-to-slow news day.

Just some thoughts.

Holland, stop trying to squeeze me out of this tournament, will you?

Hey Tom, what about a story on The Man Who Shot 200 on a flat course in Waukeegan. Robert would be perfect for that.

Hey, everybody's gotta be good at something. I'm very good at sucking at golf.

OMG, when I said, "With friends like him,who needs enemas?" was I unwittingly referring to Robert J. Holland? There goes MY career.

P.S. I don't believe in golf but some of my best friends are golfers.

No, it waren't Robert. It was another bad golfer.

I shot a 33 at Lakeview, a nine-hole part three in Calgary, when I was 15 and it's been down hill from there. Murray, next time I see you we must golf. I have to see that golden swing of yours.

Great ideas, David and Robert. David, I would love to have you join us for the tournament.

Also, you are correct that one of my tee shots once sliced about 100 yards to where my wife was frantically trying to avoid getting struck. Her strategy worked--sort of--when my shot flew into my wife's golf cart and struck my (then) 10-year-old daughter hard on her ass.

Read the entire account here. (If the html link doesn't work, here is the link to paste into your browser:
http://commakazispeekez.blogspot.com/2006_08_01_archive.html)


Kim (my wife) was wrong on at least two counts. 1) She never should have moved in front of someone teeing off. 2) She should have realized that if she violated Count 1, the only safe place to park would be on the green, next to the hole, where my ball never lands.

Robert, we had a meeting of the golf committee yesterday, and one of the members suggested that we wear knickers and long socks. He must read your blog, because this kind of insanity is caught, not spontaneously combusted. :>)

Don't worry, Jane. David was referring to a different kind of squeezing out.

Oh God. I'm beginning to sound like Steve Crescenzo.

Will Daniel:

How to play golf Will Daniel-style: Drive the cart and drink the beer.

Will

Did I mention that we plan to offer free cab rides for golfers at the charity golf outing? We can't send a cab onto the course, however, so golfers have to be able to steer their way back to the clubhouse.

I don't drink when I play golf, Tom. Golf is hard enough sober.

But afterwards is another story.

I drink to forget (golf).

I don't drink when I golf either, David. It sometimes shocks people who can't believe that alcohol had nothing to do with my score. Anyway, the idea is to have fun, and we will accomplish that at the charity golf outing.

Will Daniel:

I don't drink and golf either. In fact, I don't golf at all. But I'll drive your cart and drink your beer.

Will

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on May 8, 2007 7:49 AM.

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