...you did make a point about six flags. I think there is a big difference in earning special treatment and buying it. It would be sending the wrong message to children that it's OK to "cut" in line. No worries that I will take Scout there anytime soon. For me not to appreciate the benefit of flying some 70K miles a year is crazy.

Hey, Aunt Susy!

Hey, I'd appreciate it if, thanks to the fact that I drink a lot of beer at the local tavern, the local alderman thanked me for supporting the business by letting me walk around the neighborhood with a beer in my hand all summer.

That would be fun!

I would feel like a star!

I would do it in the morning!

But it wouldn't be a idea good for the alderman to do that; it would make people resentful.

And if you ask Southwest Airlines, which doesn't go in for such nonsense, it's not ultimately good for airlines either.

There are lots of ways for American Airlines to reward frequent flyers--frequent flyer miles, for instance--without creating a low-grade class war at the airport.

But I'm glad we agree about Great America; I'm thinking of doing a video story about this practice of theirs, where I interview people in line and ask them how they feel about the people cutting in front of them and see if I can get them real riled up.

When you're a member of the Art Institute of Chicago or the Shedd Aquarium, you get to bypass the line (which I've done, to much anger). Should I be ashamed?

Well, Diane, that's an interesting one. I guess if you're a member, you shouldn't have to stand in the line people are standing in to pay.

But if I were the Art Institute or Shedd, I'd have a member entrance, so blue-haired members such as yourself don't haughtily parade past the lumpen. I'd also do my best to cut down on those long lines. And I'd pay a lot of attention to the signage.

You may feel guilty if you like, but I don't recommend it.

There are member entrances, but when the lines are out the door and and down the stairs and around the building, everyone sees you run up the stairs to the clearly labeled member entrance, and they hate you just the same, or at least you get that impression. (More of a problem at the Shedd, of course.)

BTW, I'll have you know my blue hair is a natural reddish brown grey!!!

A little advice to line-cutters at cultural institutions:

The least you can do
Is dye your hair blue

I think there's a big difference between the two. Skipping the line because you've essentially already paid (such as a members' entrance/line at a zoo)- no biggie there, in my opinion, because once you're in, no one else's experience is devalued because you didn't have to wait in line to pay. Everyone is treated the same at the individual attractions I've never seen a special spot where members can get a better view of the elusive gorillas a the Detroit Zoo, for instance (and I was a member for several years).

However, at amusement parks that sell "line jumper" options (though surely they don't call them that), the effect lasts far beyond the entrance gate. The experience of everyone who isn't a "line jumper" is devalued simply because of the fact that they will have to wait in line behind more people.

Now, I don't care if I have to wait a bit longer for the teacups. But at Cedar Point, for instance, I've waited in line 2+ hours for my favorite roller coasters. That's a ridiculously long wait, but I didn't complain (too much) because everyone had the same wait. If they sold a line-jumper ticket, I would have to wait in line behind who-knows-how-many additional people. Hundreds, perhaps. At the very least, I think that the price of regular admission tickets should be reduced to make up for potentially longer waiting times for the best rides.

As for the airport security lines, well, I rarely fly, so I don't have a strong opinion. But how about making the security lines faster for everyone instead??

I know this isn't EXACTLY the same, but related... I am annoyed at shopping centers that mark the second-best parking spots for "pregnant mothers" or "families with small children." What other special interest group will the do-gooder food chain reserve parking spaces for next?

Just in case I have to explain it to someone, I am not against handicap parking spots -- it's the law and it makes good sense. Nor do I have anything against pregnant mothers or families with small children. But they got along fine for about 80 years before some bozo decided to give them special parking consideration.

Will

I've never seen these signs, Will. But it's hard to roll these kinds of things back. Better to start expanding it like mad, creating special parking privileges for:

Hung Over People.

People With Laziness.

People Who Are Wearing Shoes That Are Too Tight.

One more to add: People who are sick and literally look like death warmed over and just need to run in and pick up their prescription. I know it's wordy, but I think you'll agree it seems necessary when you are the sick one.

You know Disney does these jumper passes too, right?

Disney does it, so Great America does it. Let's blow off these ghastly corporate theme parks and start overwhelming state fairs and small-town Labor Day festivals.

This year as always I will play in the annual golf tournament at Kewaunee, Ill. It's held in conjunction with the "Hog Days Festival," which includes carnies and cheap rides and corn on the cob and more pork than any man ever seen.

I come away from this whole event refreshed and happy. Whereas I come away from Great America dry and sticky.

Just about the only place I can see those "pregnant mother parking" signs being reasonable is Babies R Us or other baby stores. And I can honestly say that I didn't park in one of those spots either time I was pregnant.

As far as those "families with small children" spots, I think they're just silly. Unless they can get my kids into their car seats/buckle them in/unload my groceries/return my cart for me, they're of no help at all. The length of the walk in the parking lot is not a problem at all. (In fact, I generally park farther out than I need to so that I can park next to a cart corral.)

A friend and I went to Great America last year. We went on exactly one ride, a very mild one designed for wee toddlers. We both managed to feel woozy. Lines to rides were not a problem for us, shall we say.

Diane, the worst ride for me at any amusement park is a particular kiddie ride. At the park we visit most, Michigan Adventure, it's called the Drummer Boy. You sit in a "drum" and use a horizontal steering-wheel-shaped handle to spin the drum around. Sounds mild, right? Within a minute on the ride, I thought that either my head was going to explode or I was going to toss my cookies. But my six-year-old LOVES the ride and the faster he can make it go, the better, as far as he's concerned. (He knows that I won't go on it with him now.)

david--

The list of que jumpers is endless. But there is a group going to the front of the airport line we rarely see...passengers on corporate jets. No check-in, no baggage check and no security. When I win the lottery my first stop is Cessna.

keith