House Speaker Dennis Hastart's suggestion last week that lawmakers "don't need to be taken to lunch or dinner by a lobbyist" strikes me as overkill. After all, what respectable member of Congress is going to sell his or her vote for a lousy lunch?

At such moments of high hypocrisy, I wax nostalgic for the earthy wisdom of that great Louisiana Democrat, Senator Russell Long. Long was the son of Huey Long, one of Louisiana's more -- er -- colorful politicians, and chairman of the powerful Senate Finance Committee.

Story goes that one summer, the Senator had a intern -- a college student who had a rather naive view of how Washington worked. Long made a pet of the lad, bringing him along to all the lavish social events funded by rich lobbyists to which the Senator was invited almost every evening.

After witnessing night after night of this syberitic entertainment, the young man nervously asked the Senator how he managed to retain his independence after being so extravagantly wooed.

Long put a fatherly arm around the young innocent's shoulders and drawled, "Son, if you can't eat their food, drink their liquor, enjoy their women, and still vote against 'em ... you don't belong here."