If you’re making a speech on St. Patrick’s Day, you have to tell a good Irish story.

Normally, that’s not a problem for me. Through my sainted mother, I’m related to that eloquent race of whom Oscar Wilde boasted, “We’re the greatest talkers since the Greeks.”

But once in my career, I was almost stumped. I was writing for Jim Miller, President Reagan’s budget director, and he was giving a speech on St. Patrick’s Day. Trouble was, the subject of his speech was taxes and spending, and there aren’t many Irish stories appropriate to a discussion of fiscal policy.

But I was able to recall one. It fitted the thrust of Jim’s speech admirably, given that revenue bills originate in the House of Representatives, which was then controlled by the Democrats.

So, in honor of St. Patrick’s Day, here is the story:

Jonathan Swift, the author of Gulliver’s Travels, is also known for his spirited defense of the Irish people at a time when they were being harshly ruled by England. One day, Swift was presented to the wife of the newly-appointed English viceroy. This was the lady’s first visit to Ireland, and she remarked to Dr. Swift how fresh and invigorating the air was.

Swift recoiled in mock terror and replied, “For God’s sake, Madam! Don’t say so in London. They will tax it!”