Corporate Hallucinations

The problem with injecting personality into our publications by asking such personal questions is that often personalities are inherently political or even stupid.

So, how can we make this a publication of the people without revealing offensive characteristics of the people who work for this company? It's so easy to err on the side of safety -- corporate speak out of the mouths of employees.

I don't have an answer to this question. But I do want to inject more personality -- more humanity -- into my publication, without adding a lot of words and without stupid questions or inane hobby stories. Unfortunately, quoting people about business often sounds like you're quoting a dry press release; tell me something I don't know. And pass the caffeine.

Steve, you read millions of company pubs. How do the best ones find the balance between stupidity and dullness? What's the solution?

Steve, not to disagree with your point, but you do know there's a Disneyland in Paris, right?

It's been almost 10 years since I used that roving reporter technique. It was December and the question I used was "What's your favorite holiday memory?" It worked well as even those employees who didn't observe any religious holiday had school holiday memories - family ski trips, family reunions, etc. But of course no one said anything about the holiday dinner at Grandma's when Uncle Ernie had a little too much holiday spirit and made a pass at his new sister-in-law, the former Miss July.

Employees did learn that one of the officers was a twin and as a kid had loved getting the equivalent of double gifts as well as having a built-in playmate. Another officer talked about growing up in El Paso with its unpredictable weather - including waking up to a white Christmas. There also was the employee who shared her disappointment at getting a cowgirl outfit instead of the cowboy outfit she'd requested. Another employee shared a adult holiday memory - what it was like spending Christmas on a submarine in the middle of the ocean.

I actually got some very positive feedback on the column. But, I don't know that I'd do anything similar to it now.

Because its too easy to offend or be offended by asking questions that have to do with beliefs, how about keeping it work related? For example, "What is the greatest improvement you've seen here since joining the company?" or something along those lines.

Sure, its a little less interesting than "What is on your nightstand, but at least people will probably be more honest.

Just my two cents...

p.s. Mouseicles?!

Re the mousicles: (you didnt think I would weigh in on the serious topic, did you?)

I am reminded of the sage wisdom of Paulie in Rocky V, when Rocky asks "What are cojones?" and Paulie says "That's Latin for Spanish nuts."

Thank you and good night.

You forgot the one you made fun of in my publication: "If you could be one of our products, which product would you be?" (You pointed out that it was a pretty weird question, and I have to agree.)

That miss aside, we're still doing the roving reporter thing and I think it's turning into one of the best parts of the pub. But our rule is that it has to do with the business AND be capable of provoking somewhat entertaining responses. By staying within those lines, we've managed to come up with questions that are neither contrived nor dreadfully boring. Such as: "What celebrity would you like to see endorsing one of our products, and why?" or "If you could axe one [company] buzzword, which would you outlaw and why?" These types of questions encourage dialogue about business topics, while at the same time allowing us to be entertained and/or poke a little fun at ourselves.

I am a student in Canada studying communications and I was wondering what are the job prospects like for corporate communicators?

HI!

First, yes, I know there is a EuroDisney somewhere outside of Paris. And I know people go to it. But I have a hunch those people are the French version of the people who go on Jerry Springer . . . and that real French people would suffocate Mickey Mouse were they ever to run into them. That is my hope, anyway.

Second, Alison, those are terrific questions. I think the Roving Reporter feature could have some merit . . . if the questions are good. And yours are. I especially like the one about outlawing buzzwords. I'm curious: What words did people say they wanted to outlaw.

Finally, Sarah . . . I think the job market right now is picking up. That is just my instinct, but I've heard from about a dozen people in the last two months who were looking for communicators. That usually indicates an upward swing in the job market . . . but it's hit or miss.

Steve C.

Actually, Kirsten, I like your question, too. About the biggest improvement they have seen around the company. I bet that got some good responses.

Steve C.

Having revamped various employee publications over the years (attempting to move them from schlock to strategic - maybe I'll put that slogan on my business cards), I still kind of like the roving reporter question because people are generally honest in their response. So really, you just have to come up with good question - i.e. the examples from Alison.

Sara - the job market in Edmonton is booming.(for you in the States, that's the capital city of Alberta - you know - right above Montana) Of course, it almost snowed here over the weekend, so you have to decide if a job is worth freezing your Spanish Nuts off. Seriously though, I would suggest you join either your student chapter of IABC or CPRS (like PRSA but Canadian - eh)and do some networking - the jobs are there.

From a business perspective good questions can do many things for you. Here are just a few of the things that asking intelligent questions can do:

1. They help you understand your customers / employees and their wants and needs.
2. They help you learn about your customer’s industry.
3. They allow you to position your offer to your customer / employee in a way that she will understand and be receptive to hearing.
4. They make you appear intelligent and curious.
5. They show an interest in others and allow you to demonstrate an external orientation.
6. Good questions will help you prepare for the next interaction you have with another customer / employee who is in a similar situation.

Bad questions will have the exact opposite effect. Bad questions fall into two categories:

• Ones you should know the answer to before you sit down with a client / employee.
• Questions that are irrelevant to the discussion and can only lead to equally dumb answers.

From a communications perspective, bad questions will kill the credibility of any publication – either internal or external.

When it comes to questions there is a simple rule to follow:

When in doubt, leave it out.

David and Kelly:

Great advice, both of you. I couldn't agree more. And Kelly, if you don't trademark:

"From Schlock to Strategic" I'm going to steal it.

Steve C.

I love it Steve - nice insight! Stupidity is so much fun! Particularly management stupidity... hmmm, there's got to be a blog focused on that somewhere. I just blogged you myself and related some of the stupidity that I've come across over the years particularly as it relates to my pet favorite, the intranet. Particularly answers from senior managers and executives to business analysis questions about the intranet and its value to the organization. A sampling:

• A Director of Human Resources: “I don’t understand why we need an intranet... I mean we have a pretty good phone system that cost us a lot!”
• An intranet manager who put an animated cartoon caricature of a jogging Bill Clinton on the intranet HR home page of a Canadian company. Said the intranet manager when asked the value to the business of an animated U.S. President, “But he’s sooo cute!”

Ahhhhh.... good times!

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