Oh, the joys of global communication.
It seems like lately, every time I do a seminar, I hear another horror story about some misunderstanding or miscommunication related to communicating with people from a different area of the world.
The latest happened in Chicago, at my Integrating Print and Online seminar. I was having the lamb sandwich at Bandera (best sandwich in the city; if it’s not on the menu, order it anyway, and they’ll make it for you) with a good group of communicators, when one woman told me the following story:
She was working with a male Japanese executive who hates computers because he thinks that only secretaries use them. This man also thinks that any kind of typing is secretarial work, so he never uses e-mail, as he considers it to be beneath him.
But, since he lives in Japan and my communicator friend lives in the Midwest, and since they have to work together, it was kind of important for him to use e-mail to communicate. So she started coaching him.
“I told him, ‘You’re what we call a hunter and a pecker,’” she told me. “You hunt around with your two index fingers, and peck out words very slowly. And that’s okay!”
Well, the guy did his best. His first e-mail came across some weeks later, and it was filled with mistakes and typos. But to the guy’s credit, at least he tried. And he also apologized for not being very good at e-mail. The last line of the e-mail read, word for word:
“I’m sorry I’m such a pecker.”
Ha ha!! Can you imagine what’s happening over there in Japan? This guy is going into meetings and telling everyone who will listen:
“When it comes to e-mail, I’m a real pecker!” And,
“I don’t like to type, which makes me a huge pecker!” And,
“When I told my American colleague that I didn’t like to type, she called me a pecker! Now I have to get better!”
And all those Japanese people are probably thinking, “Wow. Those Americans are tough. They don’t fool around.”
My whole career, I’ve been waiting for just one overblown, self-important executive to admit that he’s a pecker. This woman is living my dream.
Comments (12)
I'm sorry, what's a pecker?
Posted by clueless foreigner | July 24, 2007 1:03 PM
Posted on July 24, 2007 13:03
And so irony comes full circle!
You have to keep in mind that you are now publishing to a world wide audience now.
Posted by Craig Jolley | July 24, 2007 1:39 PM
Posted on July 24, 2007 13:39
Craig . . . you are so right.
Clueless Foreigner: If you look up "pecker" in Wikipedia, it will tell you that it is "a slang word for the male genitalia, specifically the penis."
However, just for kicks, I just changed the wikipedia entry to:
"See Dick Cheney."
Just because that's the sort of thing you should do to Wikipedia. And to Dick Cheney. Dick Cheney, in case you don't follow our politics, is our Vice President.
Steve C.
Posted by Steve C. | July 24, 2007 2:49 PM
Posted on July 24, 2007 14:49
Steve-
I think we communicators will be moving forward when more executives/managers/directors and the like admit that they are nothing more than peckers. We'll be able accomplish a lot more.
On a side note, I would be willing to bet that "Clueless Foreigner" is merely a pseudonym for one of your "trusted" readers to get you to define pecker. I think you have been had. And, now that I have called the person on it, I hope they confess just to prove me right.
Mark
Posted by Mark | July 24, 2007 3:54 PM
Posted on July 24, 2007 15:54
Mark:
Oh, I know Clueless Foreigner is a stateside Corporate Hallucinations reader. I am no dummy. I mean, I'm a dummy, but I'm not that big of a dummy.
Craig J. is the one who was had. Craig, one would think that someone with your years and years of experience would be able to spot a prank like this.
On a different note, Craig, I'll always remember that bottle of champagne we shared at the Fairmont hotel, in the Presidential Suite. Remember that? It was one of the defining moments of my career . . . . when I realized that there were companies out there who would pay for their employees to drink expensive champagne in nice hotel suites.
Steve C.
Posted by Steve C. | July 25, 2007 4:04 AM
Posted on July 25, 2007 04:04
>>Craig, one would think that someone with your years and years of experience would be able to spot a prank like this.
Ah, Grasshopper, what would have been served by pointing out the obvious subterfuge? By not tipping my hand it served two purposes: accentuating the need to consider a global audience before using colloquialisms or slang, and providing Clueless Foreigner cover to encourage you to define "pecker." (VBG)
>>On a different note, Craig, I'll always remember that bottle of champagne we shared at the Fairmont hotel, in the Presidential Suite. Remember that? It was one of the defining moments of my career . . . . when I realized that there were companies out there who would pay for their employees to drink expensive champagne in nice hotel suites.
Ahh yes, I remember it well. That $350 bottle of bubbly was almost as enjoyable as the $3,000 dinner in Emril's wine cave, which, come to think of it, you also attended.
I think some serious paybacks are due.
Posted by Craig Jolley | July 25, 2007 9:38 AM
Posted on July 25, 2007 09:38
For some reason the following didn't upload with my previous note:
"Ah, Grasshopper, what would have been served by pointing out the obvious subterfuge? By not tipping my hand it served two purposes: accentuating the need to consider a global audience before using colloquialisms or slang, and providing Clueless Foreigner cover to encourage you to define "pecker." (VBG)"
Posted by Craig Jolley | July 25, 2007 9:41 AM
Posted on July 25, 2007 09:41
Steve, for just a moment there I thought you were going to reflect on the need for sensitivity toward the customs of important people from other nations. I don't know what got into me! However, this did bring to mind an event from my past.
I was the civilian newspaper editor at Wright-Patterson AFB, Ohio, in 1995 during the Bosnian peace talks that resulted in what is now known as the Dayton Peace Accords. We had a lot of help, as you can imagine, not least of which was from the U.S. State Department. They sort of moved in and took over. One of my orders from a 20-something Clinton appointee was that for the duration of the peace talks we couldn't use the color green anywhere in the newspaper because it would offend one of the warring parties (never did find out which one). Can you imagine telling hundreds of advertisers that they can't have green in their ads for the next three weeks? Sheesh!
As stupid as that sounds, it clearly illustrates the point that we isolated Americans are mostly clueless to the customs and cultures of other nationalities -- and how serious they are about them.
At least the Japanese guy in your story didn't say, "I want to fruck you!" as I once heard a Japanese executive say to a woman after about a dozen Asahi beers.
Will
Posted by Will Daniel | July 25, 2007 9:48 AM
Posted on July 25, 2007 09:48
Ha! My God, what I would give for more execs to make the same admission!
I've missed you, Steve. Went to a new job in PR (not Employee Communications anymore) and almost...almost...forgot to return to the bosom of Ragan.com.
Posted by Meredith | July 25, 2007 10:08 AM
Posted on July 25, 2007 10:08
Craig:
Oh . . . . oh . . . . that Emeril's dinner in the wine cave. It's what introduced me to the world of fine dining and good wine, and I haven't looked back since. I still remember that redfish he served as one of the courses. God did we eat. You're right, I owe you . . . . come to Chicago and I'll take you to Hot Dougs for venison hot dogs and fries cooked in duck fat. You'll love it.
Will: I teetered on the edge of a serious item about cultural nuances and how we have to respect them . . . but I do have a reputation to uphold, you know. That's a great story about the newspaper . . . I'm about to go google it now and figure out who hates green in that part of the world.
Welcome back, Meredith!! You went over to the dark side, eh? Away from the pure, innocent world of employee commnications and into the cut-throat, hardball, fake-blog world of PR.
You're still welcome here anytime. And you're welcome BACK anytime, too.
Steve C.
Posted by Steve C. | July 25, 2007 11:03 AM
Posted on July 25, 2007 11:03
>>Oh . . . . oh . . . . that Emeril's dinner....
What are you doing!?!?! Trying to recreate that chirping/moaning/whimpering noise Michelle Holtz made when John Folce personally picked our entrees and served us at his restaurant in Lafayette, LA?
You know, to this day I still haven't heard a sound that remotely resembles it. (grin)
Posted by Craig Jolley | July 26, 2007 2:18 PM
Posted on July 26, 2007 14:18
Oy, the fake blogs! Well, those things don't just write themselves, do they? I spend my morning coffee channeling Beelzebub for another slurp off the horrifying client teat that breeds all of that...
Then again, this is my first agency gig after a decade in corporate. Quite frankly, can't decide in which venue I'm more accurately described as 'everybody's b*tch'.
Posted by Meredith | July 30, 2007 8:08 PM
Posted on July 30, 2007 20:08